SANDOBASU

2 days ago, I buried myself in the "mystical" ceramic baked pellets made from a mysterious energy-giving "power stone" in a southern island in Japan. Kind of like a hot bath, the above title is the Japanified pronunciation and spelling of "Sand Bath." I have written before about my friend trying to multi-level market me, and get me to experience this health elixir.

So I let them bury me in mystery nuggets.  I sweated up a storm, and literally felt my hands and feet pulsating with the heat.  They told me this was my capillaries opening up, that my body was being cleaned from the inside out.  When I got out of the "sand," they filled it up with hot water again, and pointed knowingly at the film (yuk!) on the water.  "You have a lot of impurities built up in your back and neck. See?"  Well, I didn't really see, but I was not surprised when they recommended the extended course.

I don't think I will be back for a while.  The tension in my neck and shoulders did not vanish.  I had another healthy wild rice lunch there.  And I did feel a bit lighter. (Sweat/water loss?)

The rest of the day got worse.  I found out one of my English classes (where the little girls gave me valentine's chocolates last week) will be closed, starting next month.  An insensitive financial decision. Within the hour, I had to go tell the mothers that their kids would have no class to attend in 3 weeks.  I felt really betrayed by the English school, but perhaps, on reflection, perhaps that is the nature of the beast.  They see four expendible bodies, I see 3 girls and a little guy who love English, and who have improved, who look forward to coming and playing in English. I haven't felt that angry in a long time.

 To complete the day, I also found out there wasn't enough income in I CAN's vaults this month to pay my salary.

 Maybe I shouldn't have gone to the "sandobasu" after all! 

Then again, I could choose to believe that the rest of the impurities were being purged from my being....
____

On the next day, the kids at I CAN and I made bibimbap, the Korean dish, at a cooking facility in town.  A bit of work, but looking back, with shopping, cooking and eating, they had a very good Free-Schoolish day, full of teamwork and success.

Also, in an interesting development, the college student who came by to volunteer last month (FP1 gratitude card recipient) came back for the entire day, and spent the night until Thursday.  On Wednesday night, we had a good discussion about what he wants to do in the future, and it looks like it may be possible for him to work for a cram school here in town while helping I CAN during his off-hours.  It looks like there should be a way to make a win-win for everybody with this guy.

Of course, I've only known Abe san for 3 days, and I don't know how he will be with kids, but they seem to like him, and it seems like a worthwhile avenue to pursue.

Finally, on my scorekeeping front, the scale read 68 kilos when I went to bed last night, a new low(!)

Another blog about Dieting. How Mundane.

Today I was trying to be mindful of food. The upshot was that I was mindful of this goal all day, and not just when I was eating. My mind is very much on what is going into my body these days. In a way, I think that is a good thing: mindfulness. However, I think that thinking too much about this “diet” will undermine the results I am after. Don’t want to be food-obsessed.

I had a glass of water and a bowl of cereal for breakfast, with half an apple.

For lunch we went with I CAN to the “bento shop” which makes hot, boxed lunches for take out. I chose a vegetable stir fry, and we had rice we cooked in the classroom along with miso soup and some kimchee. Actually I am hoping to get the nutritionist who works 3 doors up the street to come give a volunteer presentation for our group. Some of them have instant cup-ramen noodles for breakfast (if anything), fast food for lunch. I don’t know about dinner, but I do know they are pretty sedentary. Gaming and all. Hopefully I can show off some results before scheduling the nutritionist’s visit.

I noticed that at lunch I felt really hungry, and everything tasted good. I tried to slow down and taste the food rather than inhale it. The 13 year old boys surrounding me (and Japanese males, generally) are pretty good at wolfing down food. They learn it at school where, if it takes only 5 minutes to eat your lunch, you can have 30 whole minutes for recess. You can see salarymen slurping noodles at the “standing only” counters at the train stations. Food eating champions become TV idols.

I was able to come home at 6:30 to have a shortened dinner with my family before returning for classes. Emiko baked salmon, made a tomato salad and a spinach/bonito flake side dish. Water. Again, it tasted better. I tried (with 2 toddlers vying for attention) to focus on the process of eating. Then rushing off to night classes at I CAN.

I feel a little lighter today, less sluggish. Day four without beer though I kind of wanted one while watching the latenight broadcast (in English!) of Desparate Housewives...

GUNDAM OO

I am sitting here tonight in our classroom, as 10 of our members attempt an “all nighter” of television gaming.

I hate almost everything about “Terebi geimu” as they are called here, but on this one day, on our “Bou nen kai” (lit: forget the year party) I let them game until their eyes fall out.

They live at home surrounded by parents always telling them to shut it off.

Tonight, they can game until they really feel “full,” game until they are satiated, play until they themselves decide to stop.

I’m not sure it’s educational, but while it is fun, they eventually get a taste of “too much of a good thing,” and hopefully learn about setting good limits for themselves in terms of personal care.

In the meantime, behind me on the TV, battles rage on…

How to Get Smarter While Feeding the Hungry

Here is a fun test that also helps people.

If you go to www.freerice.com you will get a vocabulary test.

It ain't easy, and with each correct answer, the next question gets harder.

And here is the kicker: with each correct answer, the site will donate 10 grains of rice to fight world hunger.

Well, when you start playing you see the genius of the idea. The vocabulary test is kind of addictive, and the rice keeps piling up. When you miss, rice isn't taken away. It's not gambling!

Give it a try. Build your vocabulary, and fight world hunger. Hard to find a better side benefit to study and self-improvement!

Boiling Blood

In today's English class we were talking about figurative language, and one of the expressions was "blood is boiling." When I asked for someone to try to use this new phrase, everyone was at a loss, so I had to come up with something.

Then I remembered last Thursday. At the bank.

Japanese banks are not known for their speed. As a matter of fact, there isn't really a less-customer-friendly institution here, except maybe the haughty, holier-than-thou, former-monopoly travel agent JTB.

But today's gripe is about banks.

I don't really like to complain, especially on this blog, which tries to be postive. But maybe as a starting off point for "exploring cultural differences" it might be educational.

Firstly, banks offer the astouding interest rate on savings accounts of about 0.01 PERCENT, meaning depositing a 10,000 yen note would yeild a whopping one yen after a year. One one-hundreth of a cent for a $100 deposit.

To be fair, loan rates are low. My car loan is about 3%. But that is 300 times more than the interest I could get by keeping my money there.

Anyway, I went to the bank (A bank, which shall remain nameless, but contains in its name a number between three and five...)

I went to the ~~bank to open an account to receive donations from I CAN. I had our "Hanko," which is the stamp or seal which works pretty much like a signature here.

It took about 10 minutes for them to explain how hard it would be to open a new account that had a different name from the account that was already on file.

Really? I didn't know a one person per account rule existed.

Finally, we aggreed to open an account with a parenthesis after the account name, saying "donations." That only took 15 minutes.

Then the clock started ticking.

10 minutes
...15
.......20
Would I like a cash machine card? No, not needed.
................30 minutes
...........................40
Mind you, this was to open an account with 100 yen (about a buck)
....................................45 minutes
..............................................50 minutes

Finally, after about almost an hour, being the only customer in the bank with a staff of about 20, I got my little passbook. The bank lady said,
"Omataseshimashita" ("Thanks for waiting") and I walked out, wondering what in the &)%&'!! would take so long.

My good friend Simon from New Zealand said, "I always just hoped there was so much more money 'in the system' that it took longer for things to run their course."

Simon gets kudos for positive thinking but unless the passbook is being hand engraved with golden lettering, I don't see why this has to be.

And the Japanese who live here are just compliant, used to it, and never realize that when a company has to send someone out for half a day "ginkko mawari" (Making the bank rounds) that time could probably be better spent at the company.

Does anyone know why Japanese banks are like this? Any other horror stories?

Later that day I was further encouraged by my dealings with the POWERS at City Hall.

Asking "Could I bring my poster for the event tomorrow instead of today?" sent me on a phone tag game that lasted again for 20 minutes.

NOT ONE person would tell me if this was "within the rules" or not. Finally, when I reached "the man in charge," when I asked what time the event started, he had to put me on hold again to ask (a superior?).

Sometimes I am amazed this country works as well as it does.

Comments? Reactions?

Social Networking

I never really got the point of MySpace and Facebook.
Really a time-waster, if anything.

Then I found a new one.



Man, this will really eat into your day!

The idea is you get paid for how many clicks you and your referrals make every day.
It's a tiny percentage but grows exponentially with your referral tree also making clicks.

So, let's all join and make a million dollars!!

Here's the link:

[Yuwie!]
See ya there!

A dying breed?

A friend wrote last week to recommend the new book
Yakuza Moon: Memoirs of a Gangster's Daughter, by former gangster daughter Shoko Tendo. The article posted on Reuters, here, says it all.

The Yakuza are a mixed lot, at times praised for their Samurai values of loyalty and honor, while on the otherhand dealing in violence, drugs, prostitution and other not-so-savory trades.

Though the numbers of gang members seem to be declining (not sure how they are counted...a Yakuza census?) those who remain in the lifestyle seem to becoming harder-core criminals.

Once of the most interesting parts of the Reuters article was this bit, with the ramifications of globalization and its implied implications for English teaching:

"As the world becomes more borderless, they'll need experts who can deal with this too, speaking Chinese and English."the world becomes more borderless, they'll need experts who can deal with this too, speaking Chinese and English."

Maybe some entreprenureal spirit could tap this niche, with a tattoo/English salon, or a new classes at the neighborhood Eikaiwa school: "Fuggedaboutit: How to Speak like a Mobster." Or "Illegal contracts and customer service" although that niche may already be adequately covered by our friends at NOVA.

While I haven't read Ms. Tendo's book yet, I plan to. Not only is she beautiful (if that really is her on the cover), I imagine she has had a few tales to tell, and a few insights even into the future of her country. An excellent chance to see "the underside" of an already sometimes-hard-to-fathom society. In hardcover now, below.

How to Communicate with Your Child

Today in Japan more than 3% of all school-age children are truant, or “futoko.” And the numbers are growing.

While it would be nice to live in a society where alternative styles of education were accepted, that future has yet to arrive. So for many of us, it is best to do the best we can within the system as it stands.

So, what can you do, as a parent, to ensure your child stays in school?

In real estate, it is said that the three most important factors are “location, location and location.” For raising children, it’s “communication, communication, communication.”

Communication with your Child:
This almost goes without saying, but in the day to day busi-ness of life, real communication often takes a back seat to commands (“put your toys away,” “brush your teeth”) or confirming our mutual schedules (“after school I’ll pick you up for karate practice”)

All parents have asked the question, “how was your day?” and received a succinct, “fine.” The key is to ask more specific, yet still open-ended questions. “Was the test as hard as you expected?” or “did you go in the pool today?” at first seem like yes/no questions, but they lead themselves to expansion. Of course follow-up questions are allowed and encouraged!

In the Car:
This is almost a magical communication zone. Maybe because we are NOT facing eye-to-eye, or because we are ostensibly doing something else, that communication seems easier. These conversations, “on the way” to the supermarket, to school, to practice, are vital communications with your child. Because the guards are down, real feelings can come to the surface.

When faced with Silence:
Kids are not stupid, and sometimes the only time they can feel power over an adult is to withhold information. Silence, from a kids point of view, is the great equalizer. If they don’t speak, they don’t have to “give” anything, and eventually, they hope, you will stop asking.

Just because a child is not speaking does not mean they are not listening. Feel free to speak your part of the communication, because even if there is no confirmation or response (and it CAN be frustrating!) chances are your child is listening to you quite carefully.

The key point is to make sure your child knows that you will be available to listen when they are ready to open up. If your schedule prevents a heart-to-heart when your child wants it, you CAN schedule private time later with your child. Children are busy too and can understand that you have other, if not more important, commitments in your life. The point is that if you make a promise to talk about school after dinner, you MUST honor that promise with your child. The investment you make will help build trust with your children.

Build Trust by Risking Feelings

You can encourage real communication by your children when you use honest, real communication yourself. “I had a busy day, my boss yelled at me, and I just want 20 minutes to relax by myself,” tells your child where you are emotionally and how you are feeling. Bringing your mood into the communication, WITHOUT EXPLAINING IT, leaves your child bewildered and unsure about which mood, and what kind of parent he will meet each time.

It is important to be real with our children, but we must not burden them with our adult problems. Sometimes, especially in single-parent families, the child becomes a confidant and best friend, when in fact what the child needs most is a parent. If mom is feeling lonely or upset about her boyfriend, or has financial worries, perhaps those issues are better discussed with adult friends. Be careful not to demand that your children solve YOUR problems.

Love letter to Yuto

Man, you are growing up!

Not yet even 3 years old, and already you laugh, make jokes, tell fibs, pour your own milk, wash your own plate, put your laundry away (better than me--just ask mom!) fight with your 11 month old baby sister one minute and then tenderly hug her the next. She loves you, and so do your mom and so do I.

We had a great summer vacation, didn't we?
I will never forget your first trip to the ocean.
"Big one coming!" and we jumped over the little ripples while you held me and giggled.

Fireworks? "I'm not scared!"

Then our time at the pool. I will never forget you "swimming! swimming!" as you kicked your arms and legs as I held you above the water. From the bottom pool step, just up to your neck, I stood a bit away, and you jumped toward me, smiling and with utter confidence that I would be there to hold you. Even as you started to go under, you never stopped smiling. For a flash of a moment of a second I thought what it would be like if I wasn't there to pull you up. You never doubted me.

I hope you never lose that trust in people.

When you walk into a room of strangers, you assume everyone is your friend, that everyone will love you. Usually, you're right.

You look older kids right in the eye, and say, "Konnichiwa!" Hello! Good Afternoon! Nice to meet you! More times then not, shy Japanese kids don't know what to make of your friendliness, and mutter a response, or look for their moms.

You always have trouble getting to bed, going to sleep. Last night was no different. "Go to bed, NOW!" I end up shouting. You cry, "Don't get mad, papa!"

You can sing all the songs from "High School Musical" in English.

You are a good climber.

You are a good wrestler.

You are a fast runner.

Last night, I had to go back to work, to get ready for Monday. You wanted to come too, even at 11:00 at night. "I wanna work!"

Finally, after scoldings from mom and me, you got into your futon and got quiet. After a few minutes, in a real quiet voice, you said, "papa? You can go to work now." My heart felt full. "Mama and I are going to sleep, so you go to work." I was at the genkan entrance of the apartment, frozen. "Papa, suki yo" (I love you). "And tomorrow pick me up from preschool in the black car."

Yuto, you don't have to grow up if you don't want to.

Love,

your Papa.

HAPPYNESS??

I just saw the semi-new Will Smith movie called, The Persuit of Happyness. I think the Japanese title was "Shiawase no Chikara" or "the Power of Happiness.”
After "I, Robot" and "Hitch," juuust little by little and step by step I am becoming able to watch a movie starring the Fresh Prince of Beverly Hills. I never thought I would say those words.

Anyway, Fresh's son is really a cute kid, as most reviews of the movie will tell you. I guess we are supposed to be rooting for this guy going for his Merril Lynch job, but it is certainly not the most altruistic of dreams. While he was pursuing his version of "Happyness," his son was at a rather questionable Chinatown daycare center watching episodes of the Love Boat.

While I was in tune with the "never give up" message of the movie, my friend Simon, who is always good for a reality check, said that the main character was completely irresponsible. Taking his kid into the subway station restroom to spend the night was supposed to show, I suppose, how desperate he had become, and how commited he was to finish his internship at Merril Lynch. According to friend Simon, he was just being an irresponsible dad.

I guess it is easier to make sacrifices for our dreams when it is only us who is affected by our decisions (successes or failures) Once you have a family, Simon reminded me, your pursuit of Happyness has to take a back seat to insuring the safety and well-being of your kids.

The real villian in the story was the wife/mother, who just skipped out on her family because, as she said, she didn't feel "Happy."

Worth a rental, to see Will Smith's cute son and scenes of San Francisco.